Mothering Thru Melanoma

My walk through the scary world of cancer while caring for my family.

Back to Work I go! November 29, 2010

Filed under: Breastfeeding — mamabeaumo @ 3:17 pm

So much to catch up on!  I am happy to report that after a couple of very iffy days, I believe my supply is returning and that I will try and continue to breastfeed until Bubba is ready to wean.  Of course, this is subject to whether or not I will need radiation, chemotherapy or immunotherapy.  We are hoping that none of that will be necessary but I am prepared to do what needs to be done.

The surgery itself went well.  I have to say, the trip to Nuclear Medicine was not my favorite!  The dye injections were incredibly painful.  I was originally told I would need any where from 4 to 8.  Thank goodness, the doctor giving the shots went with 4 as I was about to cry if I had to have even one more!

The first few days were hard.  I spent most of my time high on Percocets.  I have an 8 inch excision on my back right to the right of my left shoulder blade and then a 3 inch incision in my left armpit where they removed 4 primary nodes for testing.  It has not been fun to have only one cleanly shaven arm pit!!

I tried pumping during the first few days in hopes of keeping my supply up but it was really difficult given my ex/incisons and also sleeping most of the time.   When I did pump, I didn’t seem to produce near what I did before surgery.  I did pump today at my usual time and managed to get 6 oz. so that’s a good sign that maybe I can build my supply back up.  Of course, it’s gonna stink if I need to undergo treatment and then have to stop altogether.

I guess we’ll find out Friday whether I can let Bubba self-wean or if after trying so hard, we’ll just have to stop.


Telling my 7 year old November 16, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — mamabeaumo @ 3:39 pm

My son, Buggy, has been through quite a bit with all my medical crises over the past few years so telling him about the current event has been a painstaking process.  I certainly do not want to scare him but obviously I can not lie to him about what’s happening.  He knew about the mole removal so we have kept the info strictly to that level.  He knows I am headed to Boston tomorrow to have a bigger excision of the mole site so that the doctor can check it out and make sure everything’s ok.  I asked if he had any further questions, concerns, etc.  He said, “Nope. I’m good.” and returned to his DS.  It was the response I had been hoping for.  So far he does not seem to be too anxious about it but we’ll see what happens tomorrow morning when Auntie shows up to take him to school and Mama and Dada leave for the hospital.


I’m Glowing…Literally!

Filed under: Uncategorized — mamabeaumo @ 3:32 pm

Ok, well not yet and not literally.  Tomorrow morning will begin yet another 2 day break from nursing due to the radioactive dye they will use for my sentinel node biopsy.  I am feeling fairly positive that all will go well and I will heal quickly.  I really hope that they will get the results to us before Thanksgiving but we’ll see.

Everyone at work has been absolutely amazing.  So generous!  Hubby is going to eat like  a king for the next few days as many people here are cooking meals for us.  It is very nice to not have to worry about “what’s for dinner” for the next few days.

As of midnight tonight my fast begins.  Ugh, no coffee and I have to get up so early in the morning!


T-2 days and Counting… November 15, 2010

Filed under: Breastfeeding — mamabeaumo @ 1:37 pm

Well, the countdown has begun to my surgery day.  I am feeling pretty positive about it so far.  I was a little concerned this weekend as Bubba has been a little congested and was constantly coughing right in my face. My throat started to get scratchy on Friday night but of course I had way too much to do to get ready for being out of commission so I just dismissed it (as mom’s always do!)  By Sunday morning, I had to wake hubby to get Bubba back to bed at 5:30a as my throat was on absolute fire!  Fortunately, some sleep and Tylenol seemed to help.  Hopefully it will be all better come Wednesday or they may reschedule my surgery and I soooooooooooo don’t want that!!

I have been nursing Bubba on-demand for the most part since I don’t know if this will just about the end of our nursing experience or not.  I hope that my margins and lymph nodes come back clear and this is the end of our current Melanoma issue.  If treatment is needed then our nursing comes to an end when that begins.  I will be very very sad and I know Bubba will have a hard time, mostly at night.

This has been a continuous personal  debate since my diagnosis.  I keep finding reasons to extend breastfeeding and hopefully a clean bill of health will give me another!


How quickly a day can change! November 8, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — mamabeaumo @ 7:39 pm

I knew that with Bubba walking on Saturday that it just couldn’t be a bad day! My surgeon called tonight from MGH with the results of my MRI.  My liver is clear of cancer!!  The spot is just a plain  old lesion that he says will not affect me in the long run.  My spleen is enlarged but it is not melanoma related!!  This news could only be better if they had already done my sentinel node biopsy and told me that that too was clear!  What a good night!!


Monday Blues

Filed under: Uncategorized — mamabeaumo @ 11:37 am

Ugh, what a way to start a Monday!!  After being up twice with Bubba overnight, I awoke to sleet and rain.  The back deck was all iced when I let the dog out this morning.  When Bubba awoke at 5a, I knew he wasn’t going to go back down.  I had 5 hours to go to hit the 48 hours and decided I would just do it!  Bubba was soooooo happy.  I was too knowing I would not have to pump and dump any more…this week anyway.

Now we are just awaiting my MRI results.  I am hoping that I will not have to have surgery on my spleen.  I would hate for my surgery and sentinel node biopsy to be rescheduled due to it.  I just want to get to the staging part.  The spleen can wait!  I hope.


Daylight Savings Sucks!! November 7, 2010

Filed under: Breastfeeding — mamabeaumo @ 7:34 pm

Well, Saturday started off fairly well.  With the help of an Ativan, I made it through the MRI without having to stop once.  Very proud. When we returned to pick up the kids, I discovered that Bubba has officially become a walker!  21 days before his first birthday and he’s off like a shot.  So proud!

I figured nothing could ruin such a perfect day…enter Daylight Savings time!  I usually love to “fall back” but it sooooooooo back fired with Bubba.  High on his new walking skills, he was up most of the night.  We’d get him down after an hour of rocking and pacing and not even a half hour later he was up again.  This continued through the night.

I also had to pump and dump and continue to do so until 10a tomorrow which is heartbreaking. I know if I could have just nursed him, the night would not have been so bad. Thank goodness, I can nurse again tomorrow!  I have had to dump close to 40 oz of breast milk down the drain and it doesn’t get any easier.  Not to mention the pained look on Bubba’s face when I give him a bottle instead of putting him to my breast.  I can’t believe that I will basically have to give it up altogether in just over a week.  😦  Makes me so very sad.