Mothering Thru Melanoma

My walk through the scary world of cancer while caring for my family.

Feeling more like myself! March 12, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — mamabeaumo @ 2:57 pm

I have been off treatment since January 10th and although my immune system went completely wonky for a while, I am feeling more like myself!

Strange little after effects…cold, sinus infection, strange red swollen spot that doctor had no idea about, swollen right nostril, etc. I have written them all off to the Interferon leaving my system. Whether that is correct or not, we’ll see.  I have my first 3 month check-up next week and I am both excited and scared.  After discussing it with my oncologist, we decided that I would not get scans every 3-6 months.  We will most likely do every year and then hopefully progress to every 3 years and so on.  I am happy about this as it limits my exposure to radiation but it also terrifies me!  What if we miss something and it becomes “too late”?

I have discovered over the past couple of months that this is basically something I will live with for the rest of my life.  I will always question a strange spot that suddenly appears, a knot that doesn’t seem to go away quick enough for my liking, a headache that never ends.  As much as I stay positive there are moments when it does get scary.  People don’t seem to understand that.

As I said to my husband, people really don’t want to know the truth when they ask you how you’re doing.  They want you to tell them that things are great.  That way they don’t feel bad and then you don’t have to feel bad for making them feel bad! And I understand that but I shouldn’t have to protect your feelings!  I’m the one with cancer!!

Buggy is definitely noticing the difference.  I think he likes that I am more active but isn’t enjoying the adjustment to my not taking the Celexa (“happy pills”) anymore.  He blames it on the lack of “happy pills” when he is being reprimanded for something he shouldn’t be doing.  LOL  I am completely off any medications that I had been given from the beginning.  I had been on stuff to help with the upset stomach, stuff to keep my moods in check, stuff to help me sleep and stuff to keep me calm when in and out of MRIs and CT Scans.  I am proud to say it’s all gone now!  A glass of wine never tasted as good as the one I had on January 14th!!  That was more than enough mood enhancement for me.

I am looking forward to the arrival of spring and participating in the Glenna Kohl Fund for Hope 5k in May. I was hoping to actually be able to run it but I am happy just to be able to walk it!

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One Response to “Feeling more like myself!”

  1. Cameron Says:

    Hi,

    I have a quick question about your blog, would you mind emailing me when you get a chance?

    Thanks,

    Cameron

    cameronvsj(at)gmail.com


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